延吉湖北乐清贵港襄阳宜春
投稿投诉
宜春榆林
滕州锦州
襄阳晋中
泰州云南
贵港许昌
娄底河南
乐清寿光
阜阳汉中
湖北漳州
海口陕西
延吉东营
河源海南

ONTHEMOON

2月2日 飞凤谷投稿
  TherewasoncealittlegirlcalledLulu,whoisalsome,thatwantedtovisitthemoonforjustonetime。AndsoIpackedupeverythingthatIwillneed,andwenttothespaceporttogetready。
  Beforewetookoff,IjustateasandwichanddreamedifIwereanastronaut。3,2,1andweblastedofftoouterspace。IwassoexcitedthatIeventooknoteswhenwewerestillontheship。IwrotethesewordswhichItheywere,Iloveflyingonthespaceshipandlearnaboutouterspace,althoughIamnotevenONTHEMOON,thosewordsIthoughtthatwouldmakemyfatherproud。
  Nowsincewehadalreadyreachedthemoon,Igotdownandjumpedup,andfiguredthatIcouldjumpveryhigh。IknewwhybecauseIlearneditinscienceclasstoday,andsoIwrote,ONTHEMOON,IcanjumpveryhighbecausethatourweightislighterONTHEMOONaccordingtoitsgravity。Iloveexploring,andheardthattherewerealsoalienshere。
  Iwasreallyexcited,andaskedsomeoftherealaliveastronautsifthealiensweretrue,Iwasconfused,Whydidsomesayyesandsomesayno?IthinkthatIaftersayingthosewordsIandtheastronautswentaroundandaroundthemoonlookingforaliens。AtfirstIthoughtthatwecouldfindsome,someoftheastronautssmiled。
  ItknowwhytheysmiledbutIthoughtthatitwasprettynatural。AfteroneminuteIheardathumpingnoise,andaqueersoundcomingfromthedarkssideofthemoon。Ilookedoverthereandsawsomequeerlittlefellowsheadingtheirway,theyhadnowheretohide,andwenttohide。Whenthelittlequeermenwentawaywecameoutofourhidingspotandwenton。Ibegantowrite,IIthoughtitwasacoolreportandtheastronautssmiledagain。
  Ididnotknowwhattheyweresmilingat,probablytheirhabitorsomethingperhaps?AfterthinkingaboutthatqueerquestionIheardanotherthumpingsoundandsomehugemenwalkedpassthemjustasthelittleonesdid。Iwasnowreallyconfused,Somelittleandsomebigones?perhapstheywerehavingagameorsomethinglikethat。
  Afterthetour,Iwasveryexcitedtogivemyreporttomyfatherandsohoppedonthespaceshiptogobacktoearth。Btfindwheretheylived。Ttsayaword。IwasnowextraconfusedbecauseIthoughtthattheywerenervoustoo。AndsotheytookanotherpassagetoAfricawhereitistheplacebesttohaveasafari,whichistohaveapicnicwithwildanimalsaroundthem。
  AfterlandingIsaid,Whydidyoutakethispass?andthenafterthattheysmiledagain,Iwasstillconfused。WhenIturnedmyheadinfrontofmyself,Isawdadonthegroundwithwildanimalsallaroundhim。NowIIwassosurprised,andeventhealienscame。NowIknowthewholeplanaboutthis。
  修改后:
  TherewasoncealittlegirlcalledLulu,whowasme,wantedtovisitthemoonforjustonetime。SoIpackedupeverythingthatIneeded,andwenttothespaceporttogetready。
  Beforewetookoff,IjustateasandwichanddreamedIhadbeenanastronaut。3,2,1andweblastedofftoouterspace。IwassoexcitedthatIeventooknoteswhenwewerestillontheship。IwrotethesewordswhichItheywere,Iloveflyingonthespaceshipandlearnaboutouterspace,althoughIamnotevenONTHEMOON,Ithoughtthosewordswouldmakemyfatherproud。
  Whenwereachedthemoon,Igotdownandjumpedup,andfiguredthatIcouldjumpveryhigh。IknewwhybecauseIlearneditinscienceclass。SoIwrote,ONTHEMOON,IcanjumpveryhighbecauseourweightislighterONTHEMOONaccordingtoitsgravity。Ilovedexploring,andheardthattherewerealsoaliensthere。
  Iwasreallyexcited,andaskedsomeoftherealaliveastronautsifthealiensweretrue,someofthemsaidyesbutsomeofthemsaidno,soIwasconfused。Whydidsomesayyesandsomesayno?IthoughtthatIshouldhavetofinditout。ThentheastronautsandIwentaroundandaroundthemoonlookingforaliens。AtfirstIthoughtthatwecouldfindsome,butanhourlater,texistatall。Someoftheastronautssmiled。
  ItknowwhytheysmiledbutIthoughtthatitwasprettynatural。Oneminutelater,Iheardathumpingnoise,andaqueersoundcomingfromthedarkssideofthemoon。Ilookedoverthereandsawsomequeerlittlefellowsheadingtheirway。Theyhadnowheretohide,sotheyfoundapileofrockwhichwasbyourside。Whenthelittlequeermenwentaway,wecameoutofourhidingspotandwenton。Ibegantowrite,IIthoughtitwasacoolreportandtheastronautssmiledagain。
  Ididnotknowwhattheyweresmilingat,perhapstheirhabitorsomethingelse?Afterthinkingaboutthatqueerquestion,Iheardanotherthumpingsoundandsomehugemenwalkedpassthemjustasthelittleonesdid。Iwasnowreallyconfused,Somelittleandsomebigones?Perhapstheywerehavingagameorsomethinglikethat。
  Afterthetour,Iwasveryexcitedtogivemyreporttomyfatherandhoppedonthespaceshiptogobacktoearth。Btfindwheretheylived。Ttsayaword。IwasnowextraconfusedbecauseIthoughttheywerenervoustoo。AndsotheytookanotherpassagetoAfricawhereitisthebestplacetohaveasafari,whichistohaveapicnicwithwildanimalsaroundthem。
  AfterlandingIsaid,Whydidyoutakethispass?andthentheysmiledagain,Iwasstillconfused。WhenIturnedmyheadinfrontofmyself,Isawdadonthegroundwithwildanimalsallaroundhim。NowIrememberedthatitwasmybirthday。Iwassosurprised,andeventhealienscame。Suddenly,Irealizedthewholeplan。
  四年级:欧阳雨鹭
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